Would you like some birth control with that pizza?

We went to Cici's pizza the other night for dinner. Essentially it's like the soup kitchen for large families--or for people who don't feel like spending actual money on dinner. It's a big pizza buffet...totally not my style. Buffets gross me out enough as it is. But one that is aimed at serving families? In other words, LOTS of little hands, sneezes and coughs touching the food that I will be eating. Blech. Anyways, Andy is staying with us this week, so it was myself, Madison, Nathan, Scott and Andy. We find the perfect spot to sit, spend 5 minutes getting settled, me scouring the filthy sticky high chair clean for Nathan, Scott getting drinks for everyone. Madison doesn't have her nice tall glass of red fruit punch for more than 35 seconds when she knocked the entire cup over spilling the contents all over the table, bench and floor. The non-English speaking mexican table busser comes over to clean up and makes the decision for us that we should move tables. Just before moving, Nathan manages to grab a big greasy piece of pizza off Scott's plate, getting it all over his little fingers and then slamming it on the table. The busser then picks up the high chair that Nathan is sitting in and carries him across the restaurant picking a new spot for us. He's lucky the rickety high chair didn't fall apart as he carried my baby boy amongst tables! We attempt to get re-settled at the new table when Nathan sneezes. This wasn't any sneeze. My poor baby has his first cold and without going into too much detail, half the contents of his nose end up all over his face, just as Andy is about to take his first bite of pizza. That's always good for the appetite. Finally settled -- again -- I stand up and notice the lovely aroma of fresh vomit. I look to my left and a little girl two tables over has vomitted everywhere. Herself, the table, the floor...you name it. Does this sound like a fun dining experience? It wasn't. When Andy noticed the display at the next table over he just said "Oh, man!" with a very disgusted look on his face. Then Scott, obviously oblivious to this disastrous dinner says, "What's wrong with you? You need to relax and enjoy dinner!"